Coffin Rock (2009)

The simplest answer isn't always the easiest answer

A couple, Robert and Jessica, near the coast in Australia, have a large house and established business to their name but want to fill in the whole picture with a child before biological clocks run out. The wife is enthusiastic but the husband feels some shame from his boys failing to swim the channel home. They go to a clinic to check sperm count when the receptionist, Evan, takes a liking to Jessica from a distance as she waits in the lobby. He travels to their little fishing village and blends in with a job at the local crayfish factory. She's a simple but outgoing small town woman in a largely male workforce who's only dealt with the occasional jerk in a bar. Evan acts imposing towards her all the while berating and muttering to himself. Soon enough he waits till she's drunk and emotionally torn with her husband and they have a spur-of-the-moment quickie.



She flat out states her regrets for their brief entanglement but Evan quickly turns emotionally attached to the point of obsession. It's more than just puppy love but some kind of psychotic abandonment issue, along with volatile tendencies of anger. Jessie has a conundrum on her hands, as someone else spied the incident, she doesn't want her husband to find out and she's now pregnant with the strong possibility Evan's the father. Robbie sees that she's pregnant and gets their friends and family excited over what he assumes is his. Though the best news turns to the worst as Jessie is getting shaken up with random visits from Evan that are getting more and more dangerous with not only herself but loved ones caught in the middle as well.

The film turns over to the destruction of relationships with one side worse and far more calculative in their deceit than the other to the point of a cat and mouse game looking like the former animal upgraded to a starved lion. It makes the experience more depressing than a challenge to correct what went wrong or coming with something more to leave with for contemplation for the audience besides the obvious: I'm not going let that happen to me! It was strange to set the tone with some authenticity, only to then turn over to an over-the-top, somewhat straightforward psychotic thriller of the cinema invention kind. It made the story go from marching to the beat of its own drum to producing shuffled around scenarios that only come with the territory of the genre.

The movie gives little to grab onto in the downward spiral after tentatively going through the messages of trusting strangers too soon and cheating aspects. It makes the experience harder to watch as it shifts more and more over the deep end with little fighting chance in sight to the point of begging, squirming and pleading of the lead actress. Not to mention, the motivations, as kooky as they are, aren't always outlined--such as the initial hookup being jumped into like an everyday thing, or why others were terrorized or made to suffer. The film creates some fear of the what-if-it-happened-to-you type, though momentarily grabbing your chest from the possible what-if compared to actually watching it play out are two different things. It turns into one stupid move after the next when more than enough opportunities are presented that are usually of the simple communicating kind. Honesty versus hurting someone? This was more than just a little case of irresponsibility.



As a thriller it's paced well enough and there are still some scenes that carry tension, some here and there memorable quality and an uncomfortable feeling as she gets stalked and pushed against a wall with an omnipresent breath in her face. There's a different range of emotions used as the story progresses from, Lisa Chappell, as Jess, being the regular, easy going woman and supportive partner at work and at home, to then trying to get out of a mud slicked hole with her hands behind her back. I'm disappointed that they didn't make her a little more tough with her above average height and confident ability to work side by side men in the town. Sam Parsonson, as Evan with an Irish accent, definitely takes a few of the scenes all out and manages to create some distinctions to his personality that come with a few unpredictable situations of what he'll do next. This gives room to make the characters and the setting carry some realism--even starting out with light drama and their day to day lives, some humor and raw innocence--though it still carries some melodramatic and exaggerated scenes past a certain point to up the ante and make it more of a cinematic experience than something that you'd actually believe could happen.

Rating: 6.5/10

Director: Rupert Glasson
Stars: Lisa Chappell, Sam Parsonson, Robert Taylor
Link: IMDB

Yoga Hakwon (2009)

Beauty at a cost

This takes over the spot for the strangest movie I've seen involving yoga. The last contender of "Kung Fu vs Yoga" included dislocating limbs and thought-to-be-impossible moves against traditional martial arts. "Yoga Hakwon," on the other hand, is a supernatural horror-mystery from South Korea that involves a group of women who want to achieve even more beauty than they already have. They're so blinded by vanity that the light at the end of the tunnel they perceive is really as dark as they come.

A woman named Kim Hyo-jung is caught up in the superficial world around her, whether it be selling lingerie on the home shopping network in Korea or dining out with acquaintances who are moving up in the world whichever way they can. There's a side of her that wants to be genuine, though currently the pressure of her friends' influences causes her to reevaluate her life. She throws a tantrum at her nice and laid back boyfriend and then gets fired from her job due to the other female co-host being more attractive than anything else. She confronts a woman named Sun-hwa who said it was out of her hands but then recommends a yoga studio owned by a secretive woman named Kahn Mi-hi--who was a former actress known for her beauty but carried a terrible voice--that might be able to help Hyo-jung with an intensive training class. So far so good...

Their instructor Na-ni tells them about a strict set of rules involving outside contact, mirrors, unauthorized food, showers and the usual confidentiality agreement. They put full trust into this unheard of studio without even a sign out front, only to act selfish towards one another to win a process involving seven chakras and a Kundalini that leads to perfectly balanced beauty that only one of the select ladies can achieve. "They say that she opened up her Kundalini..." was a line intended to be mysterious but not translated with the best sounding interests. By the first lesson it's evident they're in some kind of dark cult with supernatural powers over their new followers that cause them to perform complex yoga moves in a trance and fall victim every time they break the rules that were thought to be just for show. South Korea becomes even smaller when Hyo-jung's boyfriend gets linked up when visiting a director named Kang who casted Kahn Mi-hi, the owner of the Yoga studio, in his movies. He's not sure where his girlfriend went and proceeds to investigate, leading him to a story involving a tragic incident that happened on a movie called "Shadow of Youth" where rivals Eun-shil and Kahn Mi-hi played opposite.

The major strength of "Yoga Hakwon," or "Yoga" in the US, is its mood and some built up scares that are more abstract than logical. The yoga angle starts to show its limitations where a share of the film takes place outside of the studio setting, only to kick it up and save a share for its highly atmospheric closer that effectively plays on surface sensations no doubt but also needs footnotes to make sense of. Before that point other threads are introduced to compensate or to divert your attention. This jumps back and forth with a variety of story arcs but ends up moving around so much as to lose context. Some of the transitions seem somewhat awkward, at times overemphasizing areas and in other portions underemphasizing; like they're dressing up a simple scene to be more than it actually is but throwing the audience off as to which is which. Should you look into it more or less?

The movie is incredibly enigmatic about its references and situations to the point of confusion. Some of the exposition is a little backwards in that it will go through a certain scene with a vague amount of information, then after the fact drop a line that explains what was going on. Despite, this is drenched in atmosphere with darkly lit sets that have a cold and ghostly look with certain camera angles getting full use out of them. In some instances there are no reference points to brace yourself on to the point of feeling like a general haunted house where anything can go. It's a film that isn't entirely sound but delivers some memorable scenes and an uncomfortable feeling nonetheless like any decent horror film should. The performances carry some charms, with some possessing more of a captivating look to others adding a little quirkiness.

The effects are pretty effective looking with anything from slashes materializing on a neck to producing festering boils. There are also situations that blend CGI for more complex situations such as swiveling bodies that would make an owl jealous. The premise still gives room to think with how you're viewed in other people's eyes: how some try and live up to other's expectations, while the more comfortable of us act ourselves. Yep, being content munching potato chips on the couch never stopped anyone, yet others have to do something about it to the point of obsession and ruining the beauty they once held onto.

Rating: 6/10

Director: Jae-yeon Yun (Whispering Corridors 3: Wishing Stairs)
Link: IMDB

She's Crushed (2009)

Like a Venus Fly Trap

This is what "Neighbor" from the same year wanted to be with a pretty, young female doing ugly things with the audience helpless, only to watch in horror. The twisted background, the lunatic motivational factor and the stark conclusion that's a sum of its parts is here instead of just making a straight set up for blood and guts. This isn't as meticulously gory but still definitely violent and gruesome when it wants to be. This isn't a film for everybody due to giving off a horrible feeling with no sympathetic/rooting characters to brace yourself on as a viewer. There's nothing positive here and if there's anything to learn it hits the message out of the park, right to your door step and with a signature of who and where it came.


A man named Ray meets a woman named Tara by chance when giving her a helping hand with a heavy item just outside of his work, only to get in trouble at his job as a result of being late. Tara is back again after work and he decides to have a drink with what looks to be an easy going and inviting woman, but then gets in trouble for other reasons with his actual girlfriend Maddy who's been pressuring him to step it up with her and also his child. He heads over to the bar and gets into a wild altercation where his past wheel-chair bound war buddy goes too far. Tara picks him up outside in a drunken stupor and brings him back to her house for a one night stand. Without remembering a thing, he sheepishly leaves, reconciles with his girlfriend about disagreements and thinks it's all past. Except Tara is not the typical love-me, leave-me type of girl. She's intensely obsessive and doesn't take Ray's snubs and defensive behavior as anything but that he'll come around to see it her way or else his life and anyone who knows him is going to be a living hell.


Natalie Dickinson, who plays Tara, takes on the sadistic, sociopathic and highly destructive role with some notable merit: some of it in the editing room with her best angles, some of it with a longer scene to carry her own. There are a few missteps where she goes from nice--as if she actually wants a relationship--to then crazy--as if she just wants to hurt others--but with the audience getting steered off track of her actual motivation. Where she's effective is one moment she's appealing to the eye, but then in the next you're hating yourself for getting lured in. After establishing Ray, this focuses on Tara and her day to day with some atmosphere in between. There are some darkly humorous lines (her victim pees herself while tied up): "Jesus, Ray, she's not even house trained." There's also some comic relief by the co-worker of Ray, Donnie (real life stand-up comedian Keith Malley), who does the resident pervert guy with a share of charming diversion.


Swedish actor Henrik Norlen has some flubs with an accent and his performance as Ray is more or less carried by the story than sticking out to make it more than it is. The character could have came with a little more conviction when opportunity knocks at his door, only deciding to hide behind the blinds as if it'll all go away by itself. In other words, this wouldn't have happened to your neighborhood "Bubba": the guy who doesn't have a problem giving a woman a lickin' and polishing his hunting rifle any chance he gets. The message seems to lie a little more so on the audience than the male character it's happening to. But that might have been the point, that Tara, who's done this before, picked him as the perfect person to use: a weaker, selfish individual that didn't look like he had the strength to turn around his life, never mind saving the day.


As an independent film without all of the means at its disposal it's not a tight and tidy experience all the way through, although a share of this does work for something that has already been done before anywhere from "Play Misty for Me" to "Audition." It mostly sticks to the basics but leaves a few head-scratching threads too open to interpretation about Tara's past relationship with her parents and a prior traumatic incident. I have to give them credit for having the film build on itself and by being able to keep the audience engaged throughout with a gradual flow. I can only imagine a share of other filmmakers would either go to the hilt too soon or be too tame for what could potentially happen. The film does have some point blank scenes that jump right into it, though it also has some various levels of uncomfortableness and use of anticipation to make the audience just as unsafe as the characters on screen. These last two don't require gore, so it was a nice little balancing trick to keep the viewer busy with other modes. It's a movie that takes a huge risk of losing its audience completely. At first it'll win the viewer over with human drama or be it morbid curiosity, then screw them over, win, then back to kicking them when down again. This turns into one dark and depressing movie as a result that's not for the viewer who's used to leaning on a hero for safety's sake.


The musical cues go from contrasting but complimentary to then conflictingly matched, such as a gruesome scene with some kind of pop number over top. Maybe they were trying to do something similar to "American Psycho" to get a vibe of the times or didn't want to make it too grim, though it can be annoyingly positive sounding. There's relating points for the beginning half that a share of us can nod our head to for hookups and relationships. Then the film turns over to make this more of a cinematic horror experience with a number of exceptional events. As the situations graduate into more extreme levels, it becomes over-the-top and doesn't feel like it could actually happen. But where it replaces a cold, hard reality, the atmosphere still feels somewhat surreal in the way events turn for the worst: like a nightmare that's never woken up from. The scenarios work within its own twisted world despite going well over the message of sleeping around with the wrong person and being an unappreciative, unproductive person in general. If this is pouring salt in the wound, then Ray's character got buried in a suffocating, inescapable tomb of it. "Next time things will be different" isn't a phrase that's uttered here.

Rating: 6.5/10

Director: Patrick Johnson (SideFX)
Stars: Natalie Dickinson, Henrik Norlen, Caitlin Wehrle, Keith Malley, Robert Paschall Jr.
Link: IMDB

Misery (1990)

Gives new meaning to I'll scratch your back you scratch mine

The idea behind "Misery" involves a pretty basic story about fixation and survival after a well-known serial writer crashes his car during a blizzard and a local nurse pulls him out and harbors him in her house till his injuries improve and things blow over. This is a psychological chess match of an encounter that's a thrilling, cinematic journey that might get you rubbing your legs afterwards or just plain ashen at the sight of a snow storm on the rise for reasons other than nature at its fiercest.

The film has a certain building flow that escalates as it progresses. Annie Wilkes, Kathy Bates' character, starts out as an eager care taker and a bashful fan of the writer's work but as time creeps on she reveals a Jekyll and Hyde persona with one side being a polite small towner and the other a troubled women with a few skeletons in her closet. Paul Sheldon, played by James Caan, keeps his wits and emotions in check with a sense of dark humor despite the impossible situation he's found himself in. It's imperative that he plays along to her demanding personality as with the extent of his injuries he can't prepare his own food, never mind emptying the bladder. Though even when the weakest animal gets pushed or cornered: Watch out.

"Misery" carries distinctive traits of a Stephen King story as it starts as small as a seed, concentrates on character development and keeps you in the moment instead of worrying about technical jargon. Kathy Bates seems like she was made for the role of Annie Wilkes with her good-natured appearance and aura, but then what clenches it is there's just something you can't put your finger on, as if she's too welcoming. She's capable of pulling off both the pleasant and insane sides as if they were one and the same. This is a tale of circumstance: if two strong personalities intersect and how they ultimately interact with one another. When they first meet they have something in common on the surface, though as some find out personal information about the author or celebrity they so admire or that friendly neighbor or employee who appears normal on the outside, nothing could be farther than the truth. It's easier to fill in the blanks in our minds about others without really getting to know them...or their darkest secrets.

Rating: 9/10

Director: Rob Reiner (This Is Spinal Tap, Stand by Me, The Princess Bride)
Stars: James Caan, Kathy Bates, Richard Farnsworth
Link: IMDB

The Resident (2011)

Somebody likes your toothbrush

This is a American shot thriller from a Finnish director and put out by the recently revived Hammer Film--yep, the British production company known for its atmospheric horrors. "The Resident" gives nods to "Single White Female," "One Hour Photo" and "Fatal Attraction," where it's a dark tale of infatuation that builds and builds into a roaring obsession due to an object of desire that's out of physical reach.

Some look for specific qualities or rewards in relationships than others, such as a momentary bit of comfort, physical release or warmth and security. There's a middle ground where you both meet in agreement, yet there are those that want things to fall specifically in place and only go the way they want them to. There's going to be zero compromise with those aggressively tuned people, just a one track freight train of a strong personality and another unsuspecting person caught frozen on the tracks.

A woman named Juliet, played by Hilary Swank, is looking for an apartment after hitting a rough spot. She works by day as a doctor and after living in her new residence for a short while she's being watched with a privy eye at night. This has a few unsettling moments, as the watcher slowly works themselves up to get close enough to know what the bristles of her toothbrush feel like, as well as the brand of her undergarments. There's no real surprise as to who it is as there's only four main characters shown and three of them quickly seem unlikely. The filmmakers realized about a third of the way in and dropped the whole mystery element in order to escalate the encroaching visits in first person to Juliet's apartment. If it wasn't predictable enough, she eventually starts to suspect something's amiss and decides to take matters into her own hands in order to figure out the truth about what's going bump at night and why she feels so weird in the morning. Though the closer she gets, it causes the person to step out from the shadows for a finale that wraps up somewhat abruptly.

"The Resident" has a formula that's been done before with films that deal with unabated fixations that lead to stalking and voyeurism. This was a common template for slasher films, though this is definitely missing the gore and guts, but intact is the cinematic thrills. This does take it another step further with a few memorable scenes that push things over the top even if it mostly hints at them without actually revealing them head-on in explicit detail. That seems to be the main purpose: to show some suspenseful scenes and to cut and paste characters into scenarios in order to make that happen, as the story itself felt straightforward and ultimately inevitable. This might be effective towards creeping out your squeamish girlfriend, as it gives paranoid thought to sleeping alone and putting blind trust into strangers, otherwise there's not a whole lot of substance here to mine or to come back to for replay value.

Rating: 5/10

Director: Antti Jokinen
Stars: Hilary Swank, Jeffery Dean Morgan, Christopher Lee
Link: IMDB